Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Everything in Pictures

It's the little things: in this time between Holidays there are very few people commuting to work. Thus, I am driving and making my normal 3 hour round-trip in about 1.75hrs.
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I've been ogling infographics lately. Academically, I am interested in them because they compress complex information into simple and often beautiful packages. I revel in the appealing mixture of science and art to create these almost poetic creations. It also appeals to my belief that through careful choice and construction, the most complex things can be transferred with the most simplicity (see: haiku).

They're also pretty.
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The New York times has some truly fantastic infographics:
Movie box office performance
Spread of nuclear weapons
Consumer spending
A year in Iraq
Human disease

Especially notable is how frightening information can be displayed so beautifully.
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Furthermore: The New York Times data illustration lab. Using a the NYTimes library of Datasets, you can construct not only neat looking but interactive flash representations.

Sadly, the tools are limited to the (scant) data sets provided by the Times. Also, the amount of customization for each representation is greatly limited. It's still fun, though. Worth at least a few short moments of your time.
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This isn't really an infographic, but it is still very neat. The New York times breaks down the new NASA launch architecture one element at a time. Brought to you in tastefully mute-tone flash.
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Unrelated: Now you too can join me in the land of iPhone bliss!
Keep in mind that these are 3g phones, not like my little 2g that slides quietly passed the nastier AT&T restrictions. Still, a good deal.
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Monday, December 29, 2008

All Cleaned Up

Shaved, showered, and ready to face tomorrow. After defeating airports, plane delays, and many other sundry antagonists I have arrived home and prepared myself for work tomorrow.

I had a great time over my little vacation. It was a joy to see everyone again, and my only regret is that I couldn't spend as much time as I would have liked in any one place.

Christmas behind, New Years ahead.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Trapped In The Airpot (Updated)

I am trapped in the Indianapolis airport. Normally, I wouldn't mind since delays are just part of flying these days. This particular airport even has free wireless, which is very nice -- luxurious, even. However, I don't have a seat assignment yet. This makes me incredibly nervous.

Worst case scenario is that I sleep in the airport and miss a day of work. I'd rather not, but what can you do?
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Yesterday, I saw The Spirit. As all the reviews will tell you, it is not a "good movie." At least not in the same sense that Casablanca is a "good movie." However, it is a very fun movie to watch. It is, simply put, the comedy event of the century. Not because it is so bad (although that might be part of it), but because you will never see a movie that goes as over-the-top as this one does. It makes Buckaroo Banzai look like A Room With A View. Tank Girl becomes a predictable, but enjoyable, romantic comedy when compared with The Spirit.

A lot of what makes the movie great is how surprising it is, so I don't want to go to into detail. But I will say that if you want a movie that is straightforward in intent, DO NOT see this movie. If you, like me, enjoy the absurd and don't mind laughing while wondering "ARE THEY SERIOUS?!" then this movie is for you.

I pulled a line from an article on The Spirit taken from a comic book blog. Personally, I don't think it's worth comparing the two. Miller's movie captures the (no pun intended) spirit of Eisner's creation with its use of comic book style violence and emotions (read: ridiculous, over-the-top). All the characters stand, move, and speak like they came right off the page. This is problematic for two reasons. First, because all this hokeyness is a little jarring when compared to Miller's trademark style of film. Second, because if you don't realize that it's supposed to be silly, then it won't be any fun at all.

Anyway, this line sums up the major problem with the movie: Miller never seems to decide how cartoony the movie is supposed to be.

If it was clear from the get-go that this was going to be like Dick Tracy, then I think the critics would have been a little kinder.
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UPDATE: I have a seat, but the plane is still delayed. Progress!

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Good Morning

It's time for the official song of the auto bailout.



Don't forget!
New phone number!

SAME AREA CODE AS BEFORE


SAME FIRST THREE DIGITS


THEN


9157

Monday, December 22, 2008

ATTN: iPhone

Original title was going to be iPHONE or IPHONE, but the problem with apple's lowercase-i-based nomenclature is that it is impossible to put in all caps.

The point is, friends, that I have an iPhone.
Photo 25.jpg


Because I changed carriers, I had to get a new number. Thankfully it's easy to remember.

SAME AREA CODE AS BEFORE


SAME FIRST THREE DIGITS


THEN


9517



I look forward to your calls!

End of the Marathon

On the thirteenth of December, I began a magical journey.

It was that day that I began my non-stop all-out work-every-day effort on the Weapon's System Handbook. Well, part of that is a lie. Admittedly, my primary motivator when I hauled myself out of bed everyday was to earn enough extra hours in one pay period to take a big swatch of time off around Christmas. Because I travel home (from VA to MI) for the Holidays, I had to decide early on how many days I would take off. Meaning that I had to come up with twenty-four additional hours this week, or pay exorbitant cancelation fees from the airlines.

My original plan had me working nine hours a day for eight days. The obvious problem here is that I wouldn't get home until very late every day. The less obvious but more pressing problem was that I tend to either run out of work or run out of energy before nine hours. In the end, I came up about two days short and had to burn through my comp. leave time.

Yesterday, the big decision was whether or not to go into work and make up the -.15hr I now have. I decided against it.
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That's not very interesting, but do you know what is interesting?
CHRISTMAS.

As mentioned earlier, my plans are to trek up to Michigan followed by the annual Indiana Pilgrimage. However, Christmas has found a home at 1801 DeWitt. About two weeks ago, Claire and I bought a very small Christmas Tree while coming back from the Cathedral. It's about 3.5-4ft tall, and is one of the famous Frasier Fir trees.

Most people may not remember this, but in the mid- to late-90's a survey was released which placed the then-unkown Frasier Fir as KING OF CHRISTMAS TREES. And I can see why. The needles are fat, blunt, and resiliant. Its perfection of shape and structure is such that it sometimes looks more like a fake tree. As far as needle-retention goes it is peerless. I clipped several branches and used them to fashion a festive spray for the front door. These branches have had no water for over two weeks and despite being very dry are still supple and have all their needles.

I was also able to score some LED Christmas lights for the first time ever -- they are awesome, and also ECOLOGICALLY FRIENDLY. Or they at least lead you to believe that they are, and that's all that is really important anyway.

But it's what's under the tree that counts, and this year that has included some excellent woolen winter gear and delightful Christmas ornaments from Claire (in addition to a delicious meal) but also gifts for the faithful hound Tenzing.

From Tenzing


Click to see the exciting battle between Tenzing and a tasty bone wrapped in paper towel. I figure that everyone deserves to unwrap something.

From Virginia Apartment: Awesome


Happy Holidays to you and yours!

Monday, December 08, 2008

It's Still the Seventh

I break the story of the century.
Happy Birthday, Dad.

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Sorry, ABC. But I am not interested in seeing a Fables TV show at all. I am tired of having my heart broken.

(And you had better ALL be reading Fables. C'mon, people!)

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The development of the touch-tone phone keypad. Neat!

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Awesome archaeological dig in the Sahara. The Big Picture is the best photoblog.

Friday, December 05, 2008

It's Six AM

Do you know where your children are?

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Yes, actually. I do want this guy's job.

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A few weeks ago I caught up with Garg-alum and all around cool guy Matt Thompson at a performance of his band Mason Proper. Keith (Garg-alum and all around cool guy) snapped a few commemorative frames.

Incidentally, Mason Proper has a new album out and it is great. Highly recommend it.

(Fun fact: the last two pictures are BACK STAGE with Mason Proper! Lead Guitarist Brian explains to me that they were told to pick one beer, and the club provided 40-some bottles of it. They choose Red Stripe.)

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Further plug: buy the new Mason Proper album via InSound or iTunes.

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Floating cranes are cool. Floating cranes picking up submarines is even cooler. Scroll about halfway down.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

The Sellout Trifecta Is The Leading Cause of Minivans in America

As you may have gathered from reading my Twitters, I have been going to the gym. Not only that, I enjoy going to the gym. How did this happen? I like to say it's the sellout trifecta:
1. Girlfriend (with dog)
2. REAL job (with health insurance)
3. Gym Membership (just added!)

I might as well buy a minivan, and start worrying about whether or not the neighbor's fence line is on my property.
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But the truth is I've always enjoyed strenuous physical activity. I worked outside digging holes for various organizations for many summers partly because it just feels good to be active.

But in the end this is all Claire's fault; she's the one that started me going. I think I might be addicted.
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Is it time for a link-dump? Oh yes!
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As you read yesterday, the International Space Station turned 10 on Nov. 20, 2008. And today, the most recent addition to the ISS, new machine that converts urine into water, is fully operational. I know that gets me excited about the thrill and romance of space travel!

Joking aside, it's a vital technology for any long-term missions, such as moon settlements or travels to mars.

So, the next time you're supping at the ISS, just remember to forgo the water and stick with the wine. You'd also do well to avoid the meatloaf; you really don't wanna know where that comes from. (Rimshot)
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Today on his blog, my pal Keith linked to this video about the dangers of the Military Industrial Complex. Funnily enough, both he and I are part of it.
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An absolutely dead-on presentation about the issues facing the music industry. The presenter rightly points out that worrying about CD sales is idiotic; when consumers and artists are no longer satisfied with the way music is sold, the industry needs to respond to the demand.

Many thanks to long-time pal and former roommate Justin for the heads up on that one. Justin, I had a dream about you last night. In all the dreams I have about you, we end up being pursued by the police.

Monday, November 24, 2008

Happy Decade, Space Station!

I was disappointed when I didn't hear anything about the International Space Station's 10-year anniversary this past thursday. Thankfully, everyone's favorite photoblog The Big Picture came through in a big way. Take a look.
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WikiCommons also has some great ISS images, so check that out if you have the time.
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And for all you playing at home, this beats the record set by the Russian space station Mir, which was deorbited just a few days before its tenth anniversary.

Friday, November 21, 2008

Bachelor Chow

The perfect meal for any occasion!*

"Delicious" Recipe
Pour Vegetable Chip Crumbs over lukewarm microwaved Tostito's Queso dip.
Eat with the slightly less destroyed chip remnants from another bag.
Remember that you have a beer left in the fridge.
Remember that beer has calories; and therefore qualifies as food.
Realize that the beer is, by comparison, the gourmet part of the meal

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My super power is, without a doubt, the ability to not feel hunger. For some, when their bellies begin to empty they feel an immediate drive to rectify the situation.

If it weren't for the regularity of meals, I would blast right through the day without even stopping for a scone. This was particularly true in college. I have memories of my Freshman year, spent under a loft bed in West Quad. During finals/midterm time, I would often go a whole day without eating, simply because I was distracted by a paper I was working on.

Sophomore year continued this habit. At one point, I recall eating nothing but bread, water, and Nutella for about a week. The problem was that although I could cook, and had the facilities to do so, I frequently found myself struck with an intense lethargia. More than once, Kris would drive herself across town and drag me downstairs to NYPD and force me to eat something.

"Oh no, I'm not hungry at all." I'd say. "But, my! Is that ziti pasta mixed with chicken and sauce, wrapped in an 8" long baked roll? My goodness! OM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM."

The regularity of work and living with Claire -- who does feel hunger -- has changed all that. But every now and again I fall into my old habits. I know this has happened when I look up at the clock and realize I've spent hours watching Sean Connery clips on YouTube, instead of making dinner.
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*Read: when Claire has driven back to Illinois for the Holidays with the dog, in a rental car, and this is all you can muster.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Time to Blog

You know you've neglected your blog when you receive emails from family members asking not "how are you? when are you coming home?" but, "when is your blog going to update?"

It's true; I've been unfair and unkind to you, my gentle readers. But I assure you that my silence has not been out of dislike for you, or out of a hatred for the medium of Blog. No, my reticence has one source: work.

On the job, much like at school, I didn't really feel like there was anything worth writing about. However, I have had a change of perspective that I hope will be made plain in the coming days.
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Careful readers will recall that I am currently employed at SAIC Integrated Communications. Recently, I had the pleasure of decorating my office. I'd share pictures, but the security policy forbids me from taking any. So, if you'll just have to trust me when I tell you that I have a large, golden shrine to the Zarathustra in my office.

Beyond that, I've put up a fantastic print of Bob Dylan by iconic 60's artist Peter Max.
7A0AC2AD-872C-40AF-989C-FCE8BD39B75C.jpg

It really ties the room together.

Also up is a color cartoon by Ben Katchor, whom I did not see when I didn't go to SPX a few weeks back. It tells the story of a man who, like me, has a small non-descript office. Unlike me, he has a mysterious pipe running through his office -- the undisclosed function of this eventually frustrates him to rash action.

Another thing I can't show you is the lovely picture of feet taken by Cathy Fisher, current Gargoyle editor. It's a lovely black and white photograph showing several feet perched around the rim of a plaster bucket containing many legos. It was taken in the Gargoyle office, and was actually, I think, not staged. I liked to believe that it represents teamwork. I might write "TEAMWORK" below it in striking, bold letters.

Lastly, I put up a small painting done by my long-time pal Kris Jacque. It was a Christmas gift from a while back. Being very colorful, I think it goes well with the Peter Max print.
31978296-BB5B-4F7B-A190-1063E7DB8D3F.jpg

Puppies make an office a better place.

That's all for now. Soon, I hope to have some family photos, pictures of Claire, and a wall-sized rasterbation of Iceland up on my wall.
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Many of you have asked what Integrated Communications does. I sincerely doubt I have done an adequate job of explaining it. So, take some time and watch this video. It was written, directed, shot, edited and produced by IC on behalf of the US Marine Corps. It's a training film for the Casualty Assistance Call Officers. I have to say, it's very impressive.

FILM.

Friday, October 31, 2008

Awesome Autumn

APPLES
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Two weeks ago, Claire, her friend Kayla, and I, all went apple picking somewhere in Virginia. We had a blast, but we also had 28lbs of apples. One pie, several hours, and a bunch of jars later we know have oodles of Apple Butter and Apple Sauce. It's delicious.
From Awesome Autumn

It would be in your best interest to be nice to me. You might get some!

While picking apples, I tasted a sample of locally produced apple wine. Folks, let me tell you, this stuff is fantastic. It's from the Chateau O'Brien, and I highly recommend it.

PUMPKINS
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This year we had three pumpkins, but only two were carved. The third has been relegated to the role of General Halloween Decoration, since it decided to go rotten a day after purchase and not be a "team player."

Regardless, the other two turned out fantastic.
From Awesome Autumn


Auntie Ba has also been rather creative with the gords this year. Take a look. (1, 2)

APPLE
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When I was lookin' for a steady job, I promised myself that as soon as I got one -- regardless what kind of job -- I would do a few things. The first was to start playing the video game Okami. I haven't done this yet. The second is best said in pictures:
From Awesome Autumn


Folks, that's a brand new MacBook Pro you're lookin' at right thar. Atomsk has been a faithful retainer these past five years, but has started to fray around the edges. He'll be kept in reserve for the moment, supporting this beautiful unamed machine until it's time for him to be recycled.

ANN ARBOR
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Last week I traveled all the way back to Ann Arbor to attend the 99th Gargoyle Reunion. I had a great time. So great, in fact, that I managed to not take any pictures.

I spent most of my long weekend in the company of my best bud Kris, and the current GargStaff. They're a great bunch, and have already done great things -- as demonstrated in their website.

Dad and Julia also paid me a quick visit while I was in the area. It was so great to see them again.

I take it back, I do have one picture.
From MarsEdit Images

It's much more frightening in person.
Happy Halloween.

Friday, October 17, 2008

The First Pay-Day Of The Rest Of Your Life

As you all know, I started my new job as a technical writer/editor at SAIC two weeks ago. Since then, there has been radio silence.

Until today. Today is pay-day. The end of my first two-week cycle.

I am so relieved.
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I haven't done a whole lot at my job, but what I have done I am proud of. The first two days were nothing but orientation(ing) and online web training. The experience was not what I would call "enjoyable," but for a steady paycheck I will gratefully do whatever is asked of me.

Wednesday I attended the AUSA conference, a trade show for US Army contractors. I thoroughly enjoyed myself. It was just mind boggling to walk around a room filled with tanks, and people trying to sell you tanks.

For the next several days I caught up on info related to the job. Basically, I read the US Army Weapon System Handbook. It's a pretty good read, except for the vital information about the Secondary Redundant Paper Clip Logistics Network (SRPCLN). That made for some pretty dry reading.

Since then I've had a few projects to work on. Right now I have one internal article and a journal article on my plate. It feels good to have something to sink you teeth into.
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I'm pretty sure this doesn't make for good reading -- it is work after all.
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The only things I don't like about my job aren't really related to the job itself. Actually, the only thing I don't like about it is having to drive an hour there and an hour back everyday.
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SAIC Integrated Communications, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Sunday, October 05, 2008

The Eve

Ever wonder what I'll do if this SAIC job falls through? Flickr has the answer.


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New job starts tomorrow! All the paperwork is (allegedly) complete. I am unbelievably nervous! Oh, lord!

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Dan Aykroyd is making the coolest vodka. That is, if it exists.

Saturday, October 04, 2008

The Blessed Puppy

October 4th is the feast day of St. Francis, the founder of the Franciscan Order. He's been a favorite of mine, if only for taking off all of his clothes just to make a point.

However, St. Francis is known for much more than being an idealistic streaker. He's famous for his empathy towards animals, especially one episode in which he preached to a flock of birds. I've always heard the story as an example of Francis' characteristic kindness toward all the creatures of the Earth. But, in The Name of the Rose, by Umberto Eco, it is suggested that preaching to birds was also a satire. An expression of his frustration with his message not being received by those he preached to: no one was listening, so he may as well preach to birds.

According to Wikipedia, he said thus:
My sister birds, you owe much to God, and you must always and in everyplace give praise to Him; for He has given you freedom to wing through the sky and He has clothed you…you neither sow nor reap, and God feeds you and gives you rivers and fountains for your thirst, and mountains and valleys for shelter, and tall trees for your nests. And although you neither know how to spin or weave, God dresses you and your children, for the Creator loves you greatly and He blesses you abundantly. Therefore… always seek to praise God.

To celebrate his Feast Day, many churches hold a special service for animals -- specifically, pets. However, it is occasionally expanded. The first Earth Day celebrations at the Cathedral to St. John The Divine involved a procession of many of the animals from the New York Zoo -- including elephants, I am told.

The highlight of the service is the blessing of the animals. It was for this, that we sojourned down to the beautiful Washington National Cathedral to get Tenzing, the puppy, blessed.
Blessing of the Animals

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I am still completely excited for my new job!
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Tomorrow, I hope to attend the Small Press Expo. Ben Katchor, author of Julius Knipil: Real Estate Photographer, Bryan Lee O'Mally, author of Scott Pilgrim, and Tom Tomoorrow are to be in attendance. Awesome!

Friday, October 03, 2008

I Got A Job!

IMG_0524.JPG


Folks, the impossible has happened. I actually got the offer some time ago, but I haven't wanted to talk about it because it seems too good to be true. Much like when I was accepted to the University of Michigan. I spent the first year of college positive that I would get a call from some Dean somewhere informing me that my selection was due to a clerical error.

However, the job situation has progressed to the point where I don't think it can really fall through right now. Unless I get fired, or something.
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Starting on Monday, I will be a Technical Writer/Editor at SAIC. I'm stoked.
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In order to prepare me for my new employment, Claire took me to the Men's Warehouse. Pictures of my new chic moneysink will be made available, if the interest is there.
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I don't know if I am getting this across well enough, but I AM EXCITED!

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

An Update On The Brink Of Stunning News

I had a great, great time in Philly with E.J.. We hung around, I hurt myself bowling, and I took the liberty of introducing her to the art of Robert Crumb -- via an exhibit of his work at UPenn.

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I wonder what's happening to those Pogo books that I donated to the UM library. Here's a collection of covers.

Swear that you'll vote this year, and get a free MP3 of Wilco and Fleet Foxes (whom, I gathered from his Twitters, John Hodgman enjoys) covering Bob Dylan (who should be on Twitter, but as yet is not). Do it here!

Very nice short by Bryan Lee O'mally, author of Scott Pilgrim.
Watch your step, she keeps goats.

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Big news in the next few days. Keep on the edge of your seat. If you do not have a seat, find one and sit in it until I make an announcement.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

New Functionality, and How To Read This Blog Better

I have been operating under a false assumption: because I use an RSS Feed Reader for all my blog reading, I assumed everyone else does, too. Therefore, I was relatively unfazed by letting weeks slide between posts. You see, if you're all on Feed Readers, then I really don't need to worry about losing readers to my own inactivity.

I then realized that some of you might not know what an RSS Feed or Feed Reader is, what follows is a primer on those subjects. New stuff after the block-quote text, so skip down a ways if you like.

An RSS Feed Reader allows me to view all of these frequently updated websites from one place. It's like a newspaper, with all the latest from the sites you read. Sometimes, this is a client program -- like Mail, Outlook, or Thunder Bird -- that lives on your desktop. In this case, you fire up the application, and can view all the updates on the websites that you subscribe to. Many of you may be using a browser with built-in RSS support. FireFox and Safari can allow you to subscribe to and read feeds without leaving the comfort of your own browser.

I prefer to use Google's Reader, which is a web-based Feed Reader. I do this mostly because I don't want excess applications on my computer, and also because I can access my feeds from everywhere.

Of course, all of this only works if the websites you visit have an RSS Feed. Many sites will advertise their RSS Capability with this handy little icon:


Most blogs have an RSS feed built right in, as well as many news sites. Don't fret about whether or not the site has a Feed, just try subscribing and if it doesn't work -- oh well! Hope they get their act together and take advantage of this great system.

Subscribing can be different from reader to reader. Some of the older ones require that you enter in the URL (http://www.examplesite.com), but most of the time you can just click the aforementioned icon, and your default reader will launch and subscribe automatically. Google Reader has a link that you can put in your browser's toolbar which will do the same thing.

So, if you have an RSS reader, just punch this site into it.
If you want to use Google Reader (which I highly recommend), or your own reader, use the handy MaxFeed pull-down box just below the TwitterBox.


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There are two more additions to the side bar. First was the "Follower" box. If you have a Google account (doesn't everyone), you can become a follower and advertise your slavish devotion to the world! It also automatically adds this blog's RSS feed to Google Reader.

The other is the new link to "Max's Shared Items" in the link list. One of the great things about Google Reader, is the ability for me to share things I find interesting with other people in the form of a handy (RSS-readable) website. Click it, see what I am reading and then add it to your own feed.

Here's that link again.

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Yes, the internet a completely self-centered enterprise. But because I am sharing my stuff is an invitation for you to do the same. And I hope you will (and I sincerely mean that to almost all of you).

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Cover the Earth

When I was a child, I spotted the Sherwin Williams logo through the window of a home furnishings store. I saw it all the time, whenever I was driven up Woodward -- up by the Shrine of the Little Flower.

Immediately, I was convinced that it was the logo for an organization devoted to evil, world domination, and global genocide. Not unlike James Bond's SPECTRE or Maxwell Smart's KAOS.

I believed this because, to me, the logo appeared to depict the earth being drowned in blood. Later, I revised my opinion. I decided that the logo showed Sherman Williams covering the world in some kind of poisonous chemical.

Despite the wisdom that comes with age, I still find the idea of a world awash in Sherwin Williams brand red paint with the statement "COVER THE EARTH" no less insidious.

2AED27AB-B76B-4203-A6D5-F46009171CEF.jpg

Monday, September 15, 2008

Blow Up Your Tee Vee

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774A0135-632E-4BA7-8F82-63F401867325.jpg

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I intend to build me a home, and eat a lot of peaches. If I still have time after all that, I'll learn to find Jesus on my own.

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At least one Interview this week, and plans to be in Philly for the weekend.

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Oktapodi and Tiny Turtle





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And that's really all there is to say.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

In Which This Becomes A Photoblog, and I Wax Narcissistic About My Crappy Haircut

Everyone that knows me will tell you that beneath this cool, calm, plaid, rugged exterior is a very vain little man.
I like to look good, but more than that: I like to look good while appearing to not care, and seem to have no control over my appearance.
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With tomorrow's interview, and another on Monday, I decided that I really needed a haircut. It was getting pretty mullety back there, so I printed out a picture of my first big haircut (the same used as my Blogger Profile) and went over to Mak's Place.

I will never go there again.

Initially, I chose it because of my good experiences with the Aveda School. While very clean, professional, and well run, I have come away exceedingly unimpressed. The woman who did my hair didn't listen to what I said (conversation or otherwise), and as I result I have "4-Years At A Marketing Firm Hair."
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Part of the problem is that she really didn't say what she was going to do, or ask what I thought of the progress. Our conversation about the hair consisted of her looking at the picture, and saying "So you want it short, but not too short?"

"Exactly," I said. "I like to keep it shaggy."

That is not what happened on my head.

I guess I am spoiled from the Aveda school, where they constantly ask you about the progress and always show you how it's coming along. I've surely been spoiled by the Aveda School prices, because I was not expecting this haircut to run me $45. Adding insult to injury, the haircut lady was "shocked that I have such thick hair" and cut it so short that I actually need some hair-product crap to keep it from turning into "Light Bulb Hair" or "Straddling A Van De Graaff Generator Hair."
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From Hair

From Hair

From Hair

From Hair

Monday, September 08, 2008

Why Isn't There A Song Called, "Tropical Depression?"

That storm was lame. I have sat through much more intense and frightening storms in Michigan. Sure, none of them lasted for over six hours, but still...!

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We gave Tenzing a bath yesterday. He was not upset, but clearly was only tolerating the situation. New pictures now on Picasa.

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Big news of the day is that I have an interview for an internship with the NFPRHA on Thursday. I am very excited. I want this job.

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Preposterous Song Lyrics #1: Ride My Llama, by Neil Young.
I met a man from mars
He picked up all my gui-tars
And played me a traveling song
This is ridiculous on many levels, but most importantly the song flagrantly ignores several facts about Neil Young's guitars. In 1979, when the song was released on the album "Rust Never Sleeps," Neil Young owned well over 10,000 guitars. Furthermore, it is well known that most of Neil Young's guitars are so massive that only Neil Young himself is strong enough to string and play them.

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Someone should make a band called "Inverted Smokestacks."

Saturday, September 06, 2008

Here Comes The Story of the Hurricane

Hanna hit us around 7am. I don't care if it's a Tropical Storm, I am going to call it a Hurricane. Sounds more impressive.

As referenced in my twitters, I had to take Tenzing out to pee this morning in the rain. Unfortunately, the little blighter stayed true to form and needed to sniff around for about ten minutes before he could poop. Have you ever stood out in the rain, commanding your dog to poop in an authoritative voice?

The Weather Channel says we're in for 6" of rain -- possibly more. Cool.

Today's Playlist

1. Hurricane -- Dylan

2. Rock You Like A Hurricane -- Scorpions (Note: appropriate, since we are going to be rocked like a hurricane, and not actually by a hurricane.)

3. Hurricane Eye -- Paul Simon

4. Any Credence song, since they are all about rain

5. Down in the Flood -- Dylan/The Band

6. The Hurricane Song -- The Kids from C.A.P.E.R.

Friday, September 05, 2008

I Am Totally Going to Get Hit By a Hurricane

In case you haven't been watching along at home, the entire East Coast is about to get drizzled on by Tropical Storm Hanna.

I've never been in a hurricane, or a tropical storm for that matter, so it's pretty exciting! Everything I have read indicates that I don't have anything to worry about. I am not going to stock up on food, but I did check to make sure I had matches and working flashlights.

Keep an eye on the storm -- I know I will.

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One thing you may not know is that Washington DC, and the surrounding cities, are protected from major inclement systems with a series of massive earthworks and ground support system. This system is called, "Delaware."

According to all public documents, Delaware is a state like any other. It is in reality, a gigantic buffer zone to protect vital government institutions and free museums from storms, and giant lobster invasions.

The main line of defense is thousands of box fans designed to blow away major storms. Behind that is a barren No-Man's land of land mines, concertina wire, and pots of boiling water (to frighten the lobsters). Recently installed trip lines are intended to cause hurricanes to trip and fall on their faces, as they are notoriously clumsy.

The final defense Delaware has to offer is a catapult which launches citizens of Delaware towards impending threats. While this may seem on its surface as a horrible, callous thing to do it is easily justified. In reality, Delaware's citizens are not citizens at all but specially designed clones labeled with a hexidecimal number. These clones are used as cannon fodder in the event of Lobsters, and human shields in the event of Hurricane.

Once, a Delaware clone got loose and escaped his fate on the catapult. He now goes by Floyd, and he owns a KFC franchise in Madison, Wisconsin.

Behind the mass of bristling pungee-stick lined pits that is the lonesome expanse of Delaware is the massive labyrinth built on the holdings of Maryland. More than a few hurricanes have lost their way in its seemingly endless passages. Their mournful cries can still be heard inside its echoing halls.

Don't believe me?


View Larger Map

Monday, September 01, 2008

Google Chrome

Google is making a free, open-source web browser forged of vampire and werewolf resistant silver, imbued with the blood of St. John and pieces of the True Cross and debugged by Jesus himself.

Not really, but they get pretty lofty when they talk about it. Enough to get me excited (it does not take much to get me excited).

The important thing about their announcement is that they have decided to do it via Comic Book. And not just any comic book, but one made by Scott McCloud (Understanding Comics, Making Comics, Zot!)! I love McCloud!

Take a gander.

Everyday Can't Be Sunday...

The trouble with holidays is that when you are unemployed, they are a hinderance and not celebratory. Sure, I could use it as an excuse to not get any work done, but I already did that last Tuesday, and it was a day without distinction.

When you are waiting to hear back from perspective employers, publishers that might want to buy your story, or people you've contacted to interview, weekends and holidays are terrible days. This weekend/holiday was particularly annoying because the Metro has ceased servicing our station for some major track revision. Sure, you can hop a shuttle bus to DC National (I was told by a particularly tired and vitriolic DC native whom I met in the JFK airport that I should never refer to it as "Reagan") but that it is unbelievably annoying.

I should channel my restlessness into writing, or working for the Obama Campaign. Or just swallow my pride (and dreams) and take another gardening job.

---

It's actually been a very nice weekend. Tenzing finished his medication, and he seems to be completely recovered. Today, he went to the dogpark for the first time in ten days. It did him a world of good -- he was also going stir crazy.

Claire has finished her orientation, and will begin classes in earnest on Tuesday evening. We agree that being a student is the best vocation.

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I realized that I didn't really talk at all about PEI. Nor have I delivered any pictures. I will rectify this shortly.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

One Down...

For Better Or For Worse is ending.

Now for Marmaduke, Garfield, Cathy...

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Maybe it's the fact that the Funny Pages of the Newspapers have an all-ages audience that they are so dreadfully bland, but the Sunday Comics have been a desolate place for a while now.

Pearls Before Swine and Non-Sequiter are the only two genuinely funny strips I can think of off the top of my head. Doonesburry doesn't count, because the Detroit Free Press moved it to the Op-Ed section.

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It's been cool for three days and rainy for two. Is fall almost here? I'd like that a lot.

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Am I trying to make a new record for the most posts in a month? I don't know, am I?

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

James Jean Leaves Fables

James Jean, the truly fantastic artist behind the covers of Fables is moving on to personal projects.

Words cannot describe how upset I am. Even the weakest Fables issues were ramped up by the fantastic covers.

Sniffles.

4F4FA413-05AA-426F-A1AA-55FCF2A084A4.jpg

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Garg In The News!

Claire came back today. She's tired, and I think I might be slightly ill in the belly.

But who cares about my abdominal terror! The Gargoyle is famous again!

Read about it! Read about it!

Cathy Fisher is the current EIC. I handed it off to her. It's a shame that there isn't much interest to do a story on the Garg. There's so much great history in there, as well as wonderful people.

Despite having so much trouble trying to get a job, I don't regret a minute of the time I spent at Student Pub workin' on the Garg. Except for the hours I wasted listening to the Pixies and staring at the wall.

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Been trying to install MySQL on my computer so I can work on WordPress locally. It's not going well.

Monday, August 25, 2008

Top O' The Morning

For the first time since I got cable, I am not furious at MSNBC. It tuns out that when there is something actually going on, and real issues to talk about, these guys aren't so bad!

Maybe I'll warm up to CNN or FOX? Probably not.

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Skeletons of cartoon characters. This is so cool.

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Bob Thompson from the Washington Post discovers comics! Holy crap!

What bothers me the most about the article, and the responses from those interviewed, is that everyone is acting like comics just appeared out of nowhere. Ostensibly, this is because Thompson is interested in the elusive "Graphic Novel," but there is a whole history of comics that begins before graphic novel.

Everyone is acting like it's a shock that comics are popular, not remembering that Superman made a mint back in the 30's, and that comics didn't hit hard times until the 70's.

Lastly, I think it's silly to draw distinctions between graphic novels and collections of single issues. Most collections end up being organized by story arcs, so there is no reason to consider them as something less than a "graphic novel." Crime and Punishmen, and oodles of Dickens were written as serial magazine pieces -- we still call them novels!

All in all it's a pretty good article, and I am glad to see so much attention given to a great medium. My favorite bit is Scott McCloud answering why comics are so popular these days:

"Comics. Got. Better."

I think he might be right; I think the last decade has seen some truly amazing stuff.

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Have you heard of Okami? I am told it is a great game. I bought it for the Wii sometime ago, but I haven't played it yet. Why? Because I promised myself I wouldn't until I had a job.

Anyway, CAPCOM used art from IGN.com for the cover and just now got around to issuing replacements. They look pretty awesome.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Earthbound, Penguins, Elitism

A penguin has been granted Norweigan Knighthood.

How the mighty land of vikings has fallen.

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My friend Kris has an interesting post about why having an "Average Joe" in the White House is a catastrophically bad idea.

This is the same reason why I do not listen to any show that has a call-in segment that values the opinions of the average listener/viewer.

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Real-live rocket scientists say that, as of right now, we will never reach the stars.

I beg to differ. With the current job market, I am willing to bet that there are thousands of college students hanging around, not doing much, that would love to be blasted into space as part of a multi-generational flight to the stars.

With all the English Majors that would (undoubtedly) be on board, expect a glut of star-gazing based books of poetry, and multi-volume epics with titles like, "Spending 40 Years Sharing A Room With A Man Named Carl Who Snores," or "Doesn't This Thing Have 'Reverse?'"

Of course, I assume they'd go crazy and end up eating each other. Maybe we should send cults into space? I think most of them are expecting it anyway. They're already trained to invest their lives in sketchy plans.

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Tenzing has Kennel Cough. It is potentially dangerous, but the vet is not concerned. I'm medicating him with antibiotics, and he seems to be doing fine. The sneezing is actually kind of cute.

The only downside is that he can't play with other dogs, or go to the dog park. He is not impressed.

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Dig George Abbot White's photos. He's an alum of the now defunct Generation lit-mag, but hangs around with the GargALUMS a lot.
Try to find me!

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Applied for many, many jobs today. Many in journalism, many in publishing.

Free-lance articles shaping up nicely. Here's hopin'!

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Claire is in Iceland

Having finished her stint in PEI, Claire has gone off to Iceland with her family.

She sent me this picture of the Law Rock at the Allthing. I am exceedingly jealous, and would love to go back.

photo.jpg

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Oh Yes, The Interviews

The first week in August I had two interviews -- that's right, real-live in-person interviews -- for jobs in the DC area.

The first was with SAIC, specifically with an independent group within the company, part of which is currently doing the communications for PEO Soldier, the group which does procurement for the Army.

The second was for a grant writing position with PlanetAid, a group which deals in clothes donations.

The SAIC interview went pretty well, although I got the impression that I might not have the level of experience they were looking for.

The PlanetAid interview did not go well. It took me two hours to get to the interview, because of traffic and bad directions. I was slightly late, but I got the impression from the conversation that it wouldn't have mattered if I came in on time. It was made clear to me that they were not interested in an untested grant writer, although they did suggest that I could be brought on as a "misc. copy writer." However, that discussion was also pretty fruitless because of the 4-hour round trip commute. To be honest, I am not interested in that much driving, and I don't think they are either.

I am still sort of in touch with some people at SAIC, and there might be more developments on that front.

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I am more disappointed then I sound, but I know I have to keep trying.

I am still sending out many, many applications (several unsolicited resumes as well) but have decided to venture a few steps down The Dark Path.

The previously alluded "Dark Path" is where I start writing articles and shopping them around to magazines and newspapers. It is the beginning of Freelance Writing. While I like to imagine that such a career involves being either a grizzled, lovable rogue or a noble knight clad in shining armor, I suspect that the reality might be...something else.

To be clear: I am still looking for a full-time job. However, with so many (understandable) concerns about my experience and work history, I figure it would be prudent to pad the resume and try to make some money.

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If you've been following my Twitterings, you'll notice that I did some traveling this past weekend.

I flew out to Prince Edward Island, the location of Claire's family reunion. This involved her mother's family, who gather at different locations every year. PEI, as it is called, is especially beloved since it was where Claire's grandmother was raised during the depression (as I am told).

Take a look at it here. PEI photos to follow, but this is already much too long.

Friday, August 08, 2008

Not Virginia

Amazing story of the Peg-Leg biologist.
You must read this. If you read nothing else on this blog, read this.

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John Dobbertin, GargALUM extraordinaire, gets a mention in the Wisconsin State Journal. He's set up a massive exhibit on humor magazines, of which the Gargoyle is a big part. Check it out.

Virginia

First things first, my current address is:

1801 DeWitt Ave, Unit E
Alexandria, VA
22301



Also, many thanks for the lovely cards, e-greetings (via facebook or otherwise), and packages that have accompanied my birthday. It's been great!

Traveling

Early on the morning of August 1, Dad and I set off on a great adventure. We began with Dad commenting on the fact that I hadn't showered that morning. My logic was, as always, impeccable: there's no point in me showering if I am going to be sweaty and nasty by the time I show up!

Our route was pretty straightforward, and was quite pretty. I-70 through Ohio was a beautiful prairie dawn. Further east, the seemingly unending hours on the Pennsylvania Turnpike offered some truly fantastic views -- immense gorges, infinite acres of green trees, hundreds of miles between rest stops, etc.

Unfortunately there are no pictures of any of this. However, this is probably a good thing since my truck was handling so poorly under the additional tonnage of all my worldly possessions that it would have been well-nigh impossible to use a camera and stay on the road. All loaded down, Bucephalus did look like the Beverly Hillbillymobile, which made me happy. It was a real trick to stay about 65mph when going up hills, though.

We relied partially on our wits and natural sense of direction to get us there. I stuck my nose out the window, using my superhuman senses to track my way towards Virginia. Dad, ever the woodsman, would stop occasionally and inspect the trees and undergrowth in order to find out exact location, and the direction we should go from there. The Garmin GPS unit was also very important.

We had no problems in our journey until we neared D.C. proper, where we were hindered by poor road design and bad traffic. Finally, we appeared in Alexandria, in our finery. The total trip time was about 11 hours.

Moving

The moving and unpacking process was relatively painless. By the time we had arrived, Claire's stuff had been unpacked and put away. In short order, my things were brought up and the apartment was filled with new boxes.

Over the next day-or-so, the boxes disappeared. Claire's family (and friend) were invaluable in helping us get things set up for habitation. Though Dad could not stay the whole weekend, he did me the huge favor of setting up my brand-spankin' new shelves. They look fantastic.

By Saturday evening, 95% of the boxes were gone and the apartment has reached what may be considered it's final form.

Virginia Apartment: Awesome

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By request, here are more pictures of Tenzing, the Puppy.
Tenzing

Sunday, August 03, 2008

"We are monkeys with money and guns."

I have moved in to Virginia! Post regarding this coming soon! What follows is a post about other things!

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Tom Waits proves that, once again, he is one of America's greatest natural resources.

Here's an interview he performed on himself -- naturally, without a license.

And here's his press conference video.

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Have you seen "Garfield Minus Garfield?" It's a simple idea. By removing Garfield from the comic strip, it becomes clear that Jon is insane -- trapped in some kind of personal, existential hell.



The Beat informs me that there is a forthcoming book of Garfield Minus Garfield. However, it will include the original comic strips. This does not impress me.

What does impress me is that Jim Davis, noted sell-out and Garfield artist fully supports and endorses the Garfield-Minus-Garfield concept. While this moves him up several notches in my book, I suppose I should not be impressed. He's already repackaged the Garfield concept in as many forms imaginable for fun and profit; the next logical step would be to sell you the same product but without the product.

Thursday, July 31, 2008

The End Of An Era

I have left the Student Pub Building, where I spent more time in college than any other single location, never to return as a student.

Tomorrow, I am moving away from Michigan. It will be my longest, most comprehensive move.

I have said goodbye to (some) childish things, and put many of them (read: junk) at the curb after cleaning out my room.

These may be huge, shocking developments in my life but none of them can hold a candle to this:

IMG_0284.JPG

That, friends, is my Bondi Blue iBook being sent in for recycling. Purchased weeks after their release the blue book sported a ridiculously small 2gb drive and originally ran OS 8.6. It weighed 9.6 lbs, ran at a moderate 300mhz and had a whopping 64mb of RAM onboard. Though it was wireless-ready, it did not have the optional AirPort card built-in.

Godspeed, Bondi Blue iBook. Perhaps I will meet you again, refashioned into a better, functional, computer.

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Perhaps I am being overly harsh. I used it for years, and despite being dog-slow and woefully lacking in storage it still performed the duties I asked of it. Before recycling, I booted it up to remove any important data. After at least four years without power, it booted like a dream.

The laptop was not recycled with Apple's idiotic program, which would have required me to buy a new computer, but via Office Depot. I walked in, I put the ol' mac in a box, and am completely eco-guilt free. That's worth $5.

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I just got a rejection letter from the Georgetown Research News. This is particularly unfortunate, since it was the last publication that was on my radar.

Travel Plans -- Virginia Bound

Dad and I are zipping off at 7am from Chatteau De Eddy in Troy, with hopes and dreams of arriving in Alexandria before 5pm.

Behold!


View Larger Map

At least that's the plan for the moment.

--

Tomorrow, I pack. Tonight, I listen to Ezra Furman and the Harpoons for the 50,000th time.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Have Ira Glass Confront Your Friends!

Have a friend that doesn't contribute to NPR? Stick Ira Glass on them!

From the This American Life blog:
Hi there. Ira Glass writing this. A few weeks ago, I met this listener who had an idea for the pledge drive. He said he had a close friend who listens to public radio every day, but never pledges. He said I should call the friend and record the conversation as I try to talk him into pledging. He said I should get other listeners to turn in their non-pledging friends.

I'll admit, I'm not totally sure if this is a smart idea or not. But it seems worth a few phone calls to find out. So I'm turning to you.

I'm writing to ask you to turn in a friend. If you know someone who listens to public radio avidly, several days a week or more, talks about stuff they hear on Morning Edition or Car Talk or our show, but they never pledge...I'd like to give them a call. I'll be nice, I swear. But I will ask them why they don't pledge. And I'll try to talk them into pledging. And I'll record the whole thing and—if it works—I'll put it on the radio.

So...if you know someone like that...send me their names and a sentence or two about how much public radio they seem to listen to...and their phone numbers. Don't warn them that I might call. And send me your number too. I might want to begin these little pledge segments with the person who's turning in the deadbeat listener.

Send all the info to radio@thislife.org with the subject "Turning in a Friend."

One more thing. This whole scheme probably only makes sense if the person turning in their friend is someone who pledges. So if you don't pledge, please know a) we're still friends b) you're in the majority; most people who hear our show never pledge and c) this little scheme I'm cooking up for the show is probably one for you to sit out.

Okay. I think that's everything. Thanks for your time.

Ira Glass


Guys, do not rat me out to Ira. I don't want him to know about my failures. Also, it probably won't help me get a job with NPR if I don't donate (often).

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Knol

Google's answer to Wikipedia?

knol.google.com has a collection of articles it calls Knols -- further defined as a "unit of knowledge" -- which is searchable. So, it IS exactly Wikipedia, except that you see who the authors are, they present credentials.

Interesting idea, but I don't think it will make a dent in the Wikipedia crowd. However, you probably could site this in your College essays and not get a stern talking-to from the prof.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Don't Trust Your Instincts

I received this rejection letter a few days ago:

Dear William,

Thank you for submitting your resume to [name withheld]. Your resume has been received and reviewed for the [position to which you applied]. Your qualifications for the position were carefully considered, however, other candidates appear to have backgrounds better suited to the needs of the department.


They "appear" to have backgrounds better suited to the needs of your department? You sound unsure, or condescending. I can't tell.

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As you may have gathered from my Twitterings, I had some car trouble yesterday. The break line went, and I lost compression in the rear brakes and had very little in the front. The annoyance of having car trouble was nothing compared to the emotional trauma of having to pay for it. However, the car runs great again and will propel me southward, toward D.C.

Weird octopi with more than eight arms. How many? Try 85.

Completely awesome Rubix Cube solving robot made of Legos. Finally!

I move in 10 days.

Sunday, July 20, 2008

Background Music

The outcome of this lawsuit is critical.

If the suit is defeated, it might set a precedent against the use of copyrighted music in YouTube videos. Can you imagine the consequences? Nothing but free-license background music or awkward silence in all YouTube videos. Truly, the end of days.

I don't really know where to come down on this one. If she wins, it will certainly be appealed. The likely argument being that there is too much room for abuse.

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I can say all of this with full authority because I am a make-believe legal scholar with a Doctorate of Law from Imaginary Univeristy (Go Dragoonicorntalopes!).

Friday, July 18, 2008

Pack Different

For those with bingo cards, I am back in Troy and have begun packing up my room.

That's not interesting, but this is:

Chessboxing! Sport of Kings!

Amazing pictures of a royal funeral in Bali.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

But Why Arizona?

I recently returned from a brief trip to Arizona. I'm sure that anyone watching the TwitterBox noticed that I was there, though I realized (a little belatedly) that I didn't explain to many people why I was there.

Claire (girlfriend) spent two summers at the Homol'ovi National park, working with UM Professeor Lisa Young. After those collective weeks of sweltering, scrubbing, scraping and learning the entirety of Southwestern Ceramic typologies, Claire produced an award-winning undergraduate thesis based on the data collected from two sites in the park.

One of the sites, HP36, is a pithouse village and was undergoing further excavation when we visited. Dr. young was kind enough to take us around and tell us what everything was, and give us a history of the area. This year's dig brought some very surprising results to light, but I fear that my ignorance on the subject will prevent me from describing them accurately.

Later on, we took a trip out to Creswell, where Claire did her digging and the other site used in her thesis. However, there was little to see since each site is back-filled at the end of the season in order to preserve it.

We were also in time for Suvoyuki Day at the park, where members of the Hopi Nation have various informational booths, crafts, and food available for gawking tourists like myself. The food was fantastic: pit roasted corn is amazing. I also purchased a Cricket-girl Kachina doll, and Claire received the admonishing Grandmother Kachina doll from her mother.

When outside the park, we stayed in Winslow -- home of the famed street corner where Don Henley "took it easy." He's bee immortalized with a bronze statue on main-street corner. Sadly, I was unable to carry out Mojo Nixon's instructions, as the statue was cordoned off due to construction.

However, if any of you happen to be passing through Winslow: EAT AT LA POSADA. It's a gorgeous old hotel by the train tracks, and has some of the best food I have ever eaten. (Protip: Order the Elk, and have chocolate-covered champagne grapes for dessert.)

Arizona


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Some links I have been saving for you:

The NYTimes likes blimps, and so do I!

Save the Totoro Forest.

Surprisingly beautiful pictures of Japanese flood control gates.

Wednesday, July 02, 2008

Automated Messages

I love the automated confirmation/rejection emails I receive from the employers I have contacted.

Dear W.,

Thank you for your interest in the [name withheld]. Your resume has been received by our recruitment staff. If we determine that your qualifications match job requirements for available positions, we will contact you.


Ladies and gentlemen, I am a letter. And I am "W."

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Twittering Telescopes

Many of you, dear readers, are familiar with the online-phenomenon "Twitter."

I've been doing more Twittering lately, and I'm having a good time with it. I've yet to get it up and running on my phone, but that's my problem.

Today, in my wanderings, I discovered that several radio telescopes in the UK are twittering. They might be the worlds most boring twitterers:

Knockin Observing: space (16:28:38.403 +47:34:16) http://www.jb.man.ac.uk/vlb...

Knockin Observing: space (16:33:23.435 +47:18:58) http://www.jb.man.ac.uk/vlb...

Knockin Observing: space (16:28:38.403 +47:34:16) http://www.jb.man.ac.uk/vlb...

Knockin Observing: space (16:34:02.340 +48:09:25) http://www.jb.man.ac.uk/vlb...

Knockin Observing: space (16:28:38.403 +47:34:16) http://www.jb.man.ac.uk/vlb...


And so on.

Obviously, the only people really interested in these are the researchers themselves. Although, there is something kind of fun about having this kind of knowledge on hand. For bonus fun, take a look at whose Twitters the telescope is reading (hint: other telescopes).
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On another note, more of you all out there should start Twittering. That way, you (like me) can be part of the United Internet Idiocy (UII).

Monday, June 30, 2008

WALL-E

ATTN: INTERNET

Wall-E is the best movie. You should see it immediately.
As you all know, I am a big proponent and producer of gushing praise. In order to spare you all, I will refer you to this review from the New York Times.

Needless to say, I will purchase this movie as soon as it is available.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

From The Horrible Depths of the Internet

WIRED has an article on the upcoming Dark Knight movie. I'm relieved to read about a director that is concerned about the overuse of special effects. Truth be told, the OD on the CG is what killed the revisions of the Star Wars movies for me. The CG took those movies out of their context and confused everything. Now I watch them and I think, "How 1997!" instead of "How epic!" Don't even get me started on the pre-quals.

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The Associated Press has an oddly titled article: Everything Seemingly Spinning Out of Control. It sums up some of the weird vibes that have been floating around lately. It certainly seems that we, as a society(?), are on the cusp of something. Maybe I'm just projecting.

It's worth noting that if you look back at history, most everything was hailed as the apocalypse or something similarly cataclysmic. For instance, I'm told that the rise of the book, as opposed to the scroll, was viewed by some as a herald of the collapse of civilization.

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The Canadian Free Press has a response to "Everything Seemingly Spinning Out of Control." Personally, I think it's a terrible article. I dislike it mostly because it often ignore or apparently misinterpret the original, but mostly because I can't jibe with their beliefs.

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In the wake of my recent rejections from the print/media world, I am going to apply to be an astronaut.

The Biggest Damn Spider, and Other Encounters

Friends, it was two nights ago that Claire and I encountered what I will call "The Biggest Damn Spider," hither-forth referred to as The BDS. We have yet to identify The BDS, but I can describe it to you in disgusting detail.

The BDS was mottled grey and black, with a lighter patch on it's abdomen. The important thing is that it was a good two-inches long, sans legs.

For reference, the largest spider we could find in the Audubon books were barely an inch. It was truly massive. Claire's mother was the only one brave enough to kill it. I am shamed; she saved my life, and now it belongs to her.
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This morning I received an email from the Advisory Board Company informing me that my application was no longer going to be pursued. I am disappointed, of course. But my dealings with ABC have been some of the most positive in my job hunt. They were courteous, accommodating, and responded promptly to all my inquiries.

Unfortunately, I only have one other active prospect. Many applications have been sent (and continue to be sent), but I have heard back from a scant few. I am concerned, but ever hopeful.
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Today, it looks like rain.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Now It Can Be Shown

Upon my arrival in Galena, I noticed that my camera had finally bitten the dust. I was exceedingly disappointed, because it's such a beautiful place to be.

So, rather than deprive you of images I bought a new camera.

Lazy Galena Days



BONUS TENZING VIDEO!
Listen to me talk to a dog in a ridiculous voice!
Enjoy never-before-seen footage OF MY ARM!

Monday, June 23, 2008

Friday, June 20, 2008

Web Finds

The Web-Log, become "Blog," was originally a very literal invention. It was a log (record) of what the author had found on the internet (web). That was a while ago, and it has since evolved to mean many things.

So, back to roots blogging:

From DCist

The original design of the District of Columbia called for the creation of villages for all fifty states. These would be settled by residents of said states, creating a sort of Palace of Versais/Galactic Council system. Too bad it never went anywhere.
However, it's probably for the best. I imagine the wealthier states investing millions in their villages, making it a tacky Disney-Land type affair. "Hello, 'Y'all!' I am a real-life resident of 'Tex-has!' In my state, people dress in 'cow-boy hats!'"

And what of the blander, less stereotyped states?
"Hello, I am from Michigan. Welcome to Michigan Land. Step this way for the 'Rust to Agriculture: A State's Spectrum' log ride."

Olde Timey 3-D

Back in the day, when Zoetropes were cutting edge special effects, entertainment was a simpler thing. People enjoyed "Stereograms," which were two offset photographs that appeared 3D when viewed through special glasses. These have been revived as 2-frame GIFs. The images are flashed very quickly, creating the illusion of three dimensions.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Million Dollar Goldblum

Last night, I dreamt that the world was facing imminent peril and/or disaster. A southern gentleman -- thin, in a white linen suit with moustache -- had some kind of spherical craft filled with Gold Bullion. Jeff Goldblum, noted actor, wished to escape the amorphous impending doom and asked to get a ride with The Southerner.

The Southerner declined, then Goldblum ripped off his suit coat (also white) revealing several metal ammo belts filled with money. "There's 1.5 million dollars in there," panted Goldblum.

"Sir, you just bought yourself a ticket!" The Southerner replied.

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Due to the horrific flooding, the Julia Bell Swain has canceled all her landings on this end of the river. I am quite disappointed. The very nice lady on the phone said they hope to be back around September. I guess I will have to make an early fall trip to Dubuque.

Besides being the subject of a beloved song, the Julia Bell has a fascinating history as seen here, via Wikipedia. Also of interest is a list of competitors and winners of the Great Steamboat Race. It confirms that, as Mr. Hartfod claimed in song, "she beat the Belle of Louisville, she beat the Delta Queen."

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Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Oh hi, guys!

I was just sitting here wondering why Stephen Fry hasn't offered up a new blessay or podgram when I suddenly remember that I too have a blog of sorts.

As many of you all or no doubt aware, I am staying at the Barker Family Compound in rural Illinois for the month of June. It's quite beautiful out here -- green, hilly, pastoral. From the back deck of the house, you can see the Mississippi rising inexorably higher.

My days are spent with the dogs: Tenzing, the puppy, and Bodri, the elder. Having not spent any long periods of time with dogs in years, save time spent on uncle Mike and aunt Bonnie's farm, it's endlessly entertaining. And often, frustrating.

The DC Job Hunt continues. I've had some good responses, and have made it to higher tiers with some companies. Two in particular stand out, but it's a long process.

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Unrelated to me, Norweigan cartoonist Jason -- whom I adore -- has as an interesting interview with Wizard. Go on and take a gander.

I'd like to conclude with Jason's take on David Bowie ala The Little Prince.
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Sunday, June 01, 2008

Hometown Flick

Word has reached me that a movie-film is being shot in Ferndale, the hamlet of my youth and childhood. My church is also one of the locations!

My enthusiasm is guarded, as I have discovered that the film in question is a Lifetime channel made-for-TV release staring Sigourney Weaver.

I don't know how I feel about that.

Oh well, I'll probably watch it on YouTube or something.

LINK

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Briefly Noted: eFame

My eFame continues to set the world ablaze.

Now I must return to completing another application for the Atlantic magazine.

Quickly:
While I was sick, I did a phone interview with comics publisher Fantagraphics. I had a raging fever, was naked, bedridden, and sweated profusely throughout the course of the six-minute interview. At one point, the following exchange occurred:

Fantagraphics: What is the worst thing you've ever had to do at a job?

Max: Well, once I had to chase out some homeless people, and then bury their feces.

Fantagraphics: (silence)

I don't know if I perhaps misheard her question in my delirium, or if she thought I was trying to be funny. Either way, I did not get the job. It's just as well, since it would have required me to relocated to Seattle for several months.
I bear no ill-will towards Fantagraphics: more than anything I am pleased to have been given the opportunity and am utterly grateful at their flexibility while I was ill.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Sick, Again

Moments after completing my last exam of college, I feel stricken with some kind of flu thing.

Claire is taking care of me. I will recover soon. God help me, I will graduate.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Have You Heard About Sark?

Sark! The tiny island nation off the coast of England!

Sark! The last bastion of Feudalism!

Sark! Was once the target of a one-man invasion by an out of work French nuclear physicist armed only with an automatic weapon!

Sark! Were said invader was arrested by the island's volunteer constable on a park bench!

Sark! Where if you recite the Lord's Prayer in Norman French, followed by an invocation of a Prince, at someone you think is wronging you they must cease and stand trial.

Sark! Where the last Clameur de Haro, as it is called, was used in 1970 during a dispute over a garden wall!

Sark! A place I simply must visit!

SARK!

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Attack and Release

You should all go out THIS INSTANT and purchase the Black Keys' album Attack and Release.

It is excellent. More to follow on why this album is fantastic, and on other things like graduation soon to follow.

Monday, March 31, 2008

Pit Bulls

My friend Kris has done some work for this worthy organization.

Help the puppies.

Colorado Pitbull Rescue

Sunday, March 30, 2008

The Lazy Sunday Edition

I got up early and called around to a few of the properties in D.C. that I have been watching on Craig's List. Several were not interested in renting in August, which is interesting. I guess I am too used to the Ann Arbor time table of leasing, which holds that if you do not have a lease signed by February, you are out of luck.

There are a few places that look quite good, and are willing to lease and I'll be visiting them next weekend with Claire.

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On Saturday I met Tenzing.
He is adorable.

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Last night I bought an AP Style Guide; The Elements of Style, by E.B. White and his mentor William Strunk Jr.; and Writer's Market.

Can I have a job now, please?

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It looks like I'll soon be writing for the Beachwood Reporter, an online culture magazine based around Chicago. Though I probably won't get paid from the gig, I've really enjoyed blog-writing (here, and elsewhere) and given the fact that it's rather in vogue these days having a few more on my resume can't hurt.

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Today, hoping to rekindle my fervor for Starcraft II, I downloaded the Zerg Awakening Trailer. I have to say that I was disappointed by 80% of it. The writing, and especially the voice acting were god-awful. You have to wonder what was going through their heads as they wrote/recorded/mixed/edited/reviewed this short 133mb video.

The monologue is bombastic, and sappy. It tries very, very hard to have an epic edge, but it falls flat. Instead, coming over more as sophomoric. To me, it sounded like the kind of thing that some gothy teenagers had thrown together in their spare time and dropped onto YouTube.

Also: Blizzard is starting to bore me. I used to feel like there was some differences between the style of their games. However, everything is starting to look more and more like World of Warcraft. There doesn't seem to be much flair or originality to the design of anything anymore. Did they sack the entire art department and replace it with one, well motivated, competent, but very boring artist? I have no idea.

The video's one redeeming factor was the in-game footage. That is to say, 50% of the in-game footage was interesting. Half of it was genuinely cool battles taking place on an absolutely massive scale, and a few other, smaller, vignettes of new Zerg abilities. The other half were totally stupefying, if not completely boring, in-game shots. A squad of some kind of air-squid flying over a desert does not stoke my fires and start me reaching for my wallet. Neither does whatever is going on here:

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Are we supposed to understand that in StarCraft II, buildings will fart at each other?

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Blizzard has started to rub me the wrong way lately. While I was initially excited to see StarCraft II about to release, I have since become quite wary of it. First, they launch the site with next to nothing on it, but then fail to wet my appetite or keep me interested with regular updates. For a company that made a mint on clever, creative online communities (e.g. WoW) this seems unnaturally stupid.

If this game turns out to be another WarCraft 3, in that it is 3-D, playable, but an overall boring experience then I will be greatly dismayed.

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Tomorrow, I have to do something funny for the final meeting of my Psychology of Humor class starring the New Yorker Cartoon editor Robert Mankoff. I'm a little scared.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

The Dog Stays In The Picture

Tenzing


Behold: Tenzing der Überhund!

Claire went out to meet this darling dog this past weekend, and little Tenzing is now spoken for by this particular Barker.

Tenzing, a five-week old male Icelandic Sheepdog is from a breeder in Royal Oak -- one of the few in the country. As soon as graduation unfolds, Claire will be picking up the little guy and whisking him off for puppy training in Galena before bringing him to D.C..

It's my turn to meet him this Saturday, at which time I will present him with one of ten (10) recently purchased dog toys.

I'm sure many of you are wondering about my job prospects and all that, but for now please enjoy more pictures of puppies.

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