Wednesday, February 28, 2007

This Is Now The Blog About Blogging

[Edit: Man, this post is really boring. I'll do better next time.]

As some may have noticed, I've started to step-up the whole blogging thing. The way I figure it, it's probably good for me. True, it does take up some of my time - and with school pressures and what not, that might not be such a great idea. However, I retort thus:

Firstly, it forces me to write. I enjoy writing, and it's something that I really want to pursue. Who knows, maybe even try to make a career out of it (one way or another). My good friend Keith, who is much wiser than me, once told me that if you want to write then you need to make time to do it. In the sense of everyday. I may not be pulling off everyday, but Im at least doing something.

Secondly, as anyone who knows me can attest I am not the most organized of people. The idea of having a deadline and trying to stick to it might just form some of those good habits that I keep hearing about. So far, it's working alright as an experiment in self-discipline. Most days I get the posts finished on time, but I haven't gotten to the point where I have worked ahead and proof what I blog. Hopefully, that will change. I've started to get into the habit of working ahead, writing smaller not so great posts that I keep around as a buffer. With any luck, this buffer will evolve into a system for creating quality, finished material.

On the subject of blogging, I've been experimenting with new ways to blog. Nothing to crazy yet, I've got some cool ideas that have yet to be realized but they'll have to wait. For those of you that are of age and don't mind the occasional poop joke, some of these new ideas might just come to fruition when we launch the Gargoyle 3.0 site. Anyway, lately I've been playing around with blogging clients.
A 'blogging client' is an application which I use to write and post to the web. For a long time Journler was my client of choice. I could do all my writing in Journler, which stores all the scraps and makes them searchable. Its main convenience was the ability to post to multiple blogs. I could write something for TalkingEds, Alive and Kicking and LiveJournal accounts and manage all the posting from Journler.
However, the update of Blogger has left Journler looking ragged about the edges. It can't handle dealing with the new Blogger system and has no support of tagging posts - a handy method of organization that I've tried to employ into my posts.
I gave Ecto and Marsedit a spin, but both were just not playing nice with blogger and neither seemed willing to play nice with tags.
So Im sticking with Journler - for now.
But I do need a change.

There's been some rumblings via email and comments that people want to learn about viking longships. Viking longships are totally awesome, and I am working on a little something to share for all interested parties.

In the meantime, I must ready myself for my journey to Indiana.
(Leaving Ann Arbor: Wed. Morning)
(Leaving West Lafayette: Sat. Morning)

Monday, February 26, 2007

Talking to Students

Now as you all know, this week is the University of Michigan's Spring Break. As we speak, thousands of students are leaving the city of Ann Arbor and wandering home, navigating primarily by landmarks and the promise of free food and laundry services. Many of you, out there in the world, do not live in Ann Arbor and may be stunned by the sudden re-appearance of people you haven't seen in years. Do not be alarmed! As the University vomits its beloved students upon your community, you may be wondering how to deal with interacting with people that are your intellectual, physical and social superiors.

It's very easy, provided you follow these simple steps:

1. The Approach
Your average UM student is a feisty weasel. After weeks of sweet talking their way out of assignments and foraging for edibles , they will seem at first skittish and stand off-ish. When you spot one, approach with bent posture to show your submission before their self-importance. Be sure to have cash and burritos protruding dangerously from your pocket, It's often helpful to say in a loud voice, "Oh no! My money and my dinner are hanging precariously out of my pocket!" Allow the student to snatch them away, thus affirming their sense of superiority. Once the student has begun to inspect the burrito, you can move on to step 2.

2. The Greeting
After getting the attention of a student, you should now greet them as soon as possible. The greeting is essential - do not forget to greet the student! First, feign ignorance of their level of education. Ask them, 'where do you go to school?' When they reply, immediately drop to the ground placing both hands firmly on the pavement. Immediately beg their forgiveness for your own stupidity and ask them to lay their hands on your head so that you may know the sensation of touching brilliance. Only after they have touched your head, should you rise - but never above their height.
Continue with the greeting by offering them land, wives, and the use of laundry facilities. The practice of 'gifting' is very important to the UM student - give them something. Be sure, when singing the praises of the student that all the correct honorifics are used. 'Sir,' should be used only for a freshman, 'Lord' for a Sophomore, 'Great one' for a junior,' and 'Galaxor Nebulon - ruler of the 12 Nefftel Clusters of the great outer arm - whose eyes shall command all he sees with great wrath and vengeance' for a senior. All female students should be addressed as, 'Madame,' 'Empress,' 'Honey,' or 'Shnookums.'
Once the student has allowed you to make eye contact, may you move on to the actual conversation.

3. The Conversation
For the non-student, the conversation phase is the easiest of all of the steps. Simply ask, 'how are things at school,' and then do nothing. You will note an instant twinkling in the students eye, and a sudden lightness about their person. They will immediately launch into a long tirade centered around very long words and very difficult concepts. They will, however, not really understand what they're talking about and will veil their ignorance as much as possible.
Do not attempt to ask for clarifications, simply nod while the student speaks and comment on how impressed you are. Though proud, the student is easily wounded, especially in discussions of his/her academics. They must feel as if they have accomplished something, it's best not to rob them of this one indulgence - its what they live for.

4. The Escape
Though you may love them, you certainly do not want to have to listen to a student all day, and now that you have got them going its going to be very hard to get them to stop. There is no way out of a conversation with a student, except to deflect the conversation on to something that the student fears. Ask them about their finances, about their love lives or about their plans for the future. You'll notice an almost instantaneous change. The student will shrink back, as if poked with a stick. This will not, however stop them from talking. Instead, they'll launch into a lengthy explanation. Do not them being their explanation. In the split second of indecision after you ask them you must quickly run out of the room. It may help to throw glitter in the face of the student so as to confuse and disorient them. If you can afford it, you can also through Gary Coleman.

- - - - -

Hope nobody gets rubbed the wrong way by that. It seemed funny to me at the time.

Sunday, February 25, 2007

The Precursor To The Main Event

Well, Im out of School. At the moment I am in the TroyDizzle, mixing it up on the familial kitchen table. I've just filled myself with two days worth of delicious home made meals, but sadly I must leave tomorrow. It's imperative that I return to Ann Arbor - The Big Sleazy - and engage the final stages of my hunt for an apartment.

And I hope you don't mind that I took a few days off to enjoy some vacation time. I actually spent a good chunk (small chunk) of it doing homework, but I think we are finally passed that now.

Tomorrow will mark the beginning of the UM Spring Break. Stay tuned for an important update.

PS.
Yes I plan on being in the Indiana most soon - probably mid-week. But first I need to get a hold of Grandma.

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Quick!

Last night just did not happen in terms of the Blog - my apologies! I did, however, write a pretty awesome paper, so I think it's a worthy tradeoff.

RESERVE THIS SPOT FOR A POST - SOON!

Monday, February 19, 2007

I Like To Toss Things

I've got another paper due Wednesday that I have started working on. Claire's been sick all weekend and I've been taking care of her. Put 'em together, and I've been a busy bee. Non-stop run-around since Friday night, at least.
Please accept this humble filler post, prepared for just such an emergency.

[x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x][x]

The other day I was standing in the shower, like you do, washing my hair. Being a totally hot dude, this kind of a problem since I have wash some serious footage of hair. This leads to really long showers, simply based on necessity. I also take forever because I wake up freezing every morning. I honestly feel like I receive all my body heat for the day from the showers I take in the morning. Which - of course - results in even longer showers. I need to recharge my heated core! It's vital!
So, Im taking this 1,000ºC shower, getting ready for my day, and I bend over and pick up the shampoo bottle by it's cap. Then, I did something amazing. I deftly flicked my wrist and released the bottle into mid air for a fraction of a second. At more or less the time the bottle was loosing all it's upward momentum and was on the cusp of being pulled tub-ward, I grabbed the bottle at it's center. I did this for a better grip before dispensing it's cleansing goo. I do this all the time, and not just with shower goo bottles! When I was in marching band, way back in High School, I would do the same trick with my clarinet to get a better grip. Everyday, I whip my cellphone out in the same manner. I hardly ever drop it.
I heard on NPR that famed soccer playing "BECKEM" (or some such thing) performs thousands of calculations in seconds to be able to intercept a flying soccer ball with his head, and send it in for a goal. This involves differential equations, which anyone who is taken higher math than me (which is apparently everyone) can tell you are very hard. Some of the first computers were contracted by the US Defense Dept. to calculate firing tables utilizing differential equations, basically so that the allies could win the war. At least that's what they tell me in my Computers in Literature class.
Anyway, humans do really hard math instinctively and for the most part we do it really, really well. Ever watch those videos of dudes bouncing off walls like theirs something wrong with em'? Yeah. Thats some heavy physics, dudes.
As I was standing in the shower, marveling at my abilities, I wondered 'was this all learned? Did I work all this out as a baby or was I born with these instincts?' Of course, I have no idea what the answer is, but while washing out the conditioner, I had another thought: 'what if a baby was taken to another planet that had similar gravity, but not exactly the same, as our own planet. Would the kid be able to do these neat tricks? Or would his DNA, hard-wired to thousands of years on Earth be unable to cope?'

Still, I have no idea.

We need someone to find a planet and volunteer a baby.

Friday, February 16, 2007

It's a late post tonight, but I had a very important paper due at 11:45 - which is RIGHT NOW - that had to be done. I wrote on the use of visual devices in William Joyce's A Day With Wilbur Robinson. This is one of my long time favorite books, and it was a pleasure to research. But writing it was a different story. I've been behind all week in classes, couple that with the daily work in addition to assignments I was looking at a rough couple of days no matter how I sliced it.
But the paper is done, and that's the important thing. Right?
Nope, sorry.
You see, earlier in the week we were uploading files for the class. And I screwed up the filename. Im not very good with the CTools system that we use for uploading, I guess that's my defense.
Anyway, I was told to basically 'don't screw up again.'
Well, I did. I messed up the filename again. Hopefully, I will be forgiven.

Tomorrow I have to do a presentation on Viking Ships. Hopefully I can get it finished up before 11am tomorrow. At the moment I am watching the Fifth Element - which I have never seen in it's entirety. So far, it's the coolest thing to happen to me all night. I wanted to go out with Kris tonight and get post-Valentine's Day candy, but I just have too much to do.

That's all kind of a downer isn't it?
Let's go to the Mailbag.

In the commentary from the last blog 'Barb' asks, "why is it called Green-land? Was someone being funny?"

Actually, yes. Or rather, someone was pulling a con job on the Norweigans and the Icelanders. The actual discovery and colonization of Greenland is recorded in the Vinland Sagas, which I have to present for a class tomorrow! How convenient! Eirik the Red, son of Thorvald, left Norway because of some killings. In Iceland, Eirik was given outlawry for other troubles and decided that he should go on an ocean voyage. Eirik constantly discovers Greenland. As it is written in the Grænlendiga Saga, page 50, Eirik "named the country he discovered Greenland, for he said that people would be much more tempted to go there if it had an attractive name."
Aren't the Icelandic Sagas fantastic? Everyone should read them. You can read more about the Norse discovery of North America in The Vinland Sagas.

'Aunt Julie' wrote, "You were leafing through a Popular Mechanics from 1953??? Were you in Back to the Future?"

No, but I was spending a cozy evening in the Gargoyle office! There's nothing funnier than old Popular Mechanics, and we draw on them often as a comedic source. Serously, I need to scan some of those - they are awesome!

Alright, back to work. I've got a lot of learning to do about viking Long Ships.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

It's A Mite Chilly In Here

It's been snowing in Ann Arbor ever since the top of the page, and looks like it's going to stick around for a while.

Oddly, everyone is complaining. This isn't so odd an occurrence, this is winter we're in and we are all stuck in Michigan so complaining about cold, inclement weather is not unheard of.
So the weird vibe, Max? Simple: because about 8 months ago (or so) everyone was talking about how BAD global warming is. Everyone saw the Al Gore movie and was - at that moment - deeply concerned about adorable polar bears and the fate of the world on the whole (but mostly the adorable polar bear). So, here we are, experiencing what is relatively normal weather for this time of year and everyone is complaining! This is what you wanted! Good ol' normal Michigan winters!

Actually, Global Warming continues to terrify me. I heard last week that some massive chunk (23 square miles, that's 23x bigger than the Vatican) of ice broke off and melted in a few days. That's pretty scary! I've also heard that Greenland is melting really fast. While the loss of Greenland would improve the overall perspective of maps all around the world (it's always depicted much too large), it's not cool that it's disappearing. Hopefully Iceland will survive long enough for me to go and visit it.

Another thought on Global Warming: I was leafing through a Popular Mechanics from 1953 and even back then they were talking about a 'dangerous warming trend' across the world. They even used the same pictures of the same receding glacier that Gore used in his movie! Wiggy! They do, however, come short of really addressing the problem in the magazine. Every time the interviewer comes close, he veers off and starts talking about 'cloud seeding' or some other crap. Ah well.

Someone needs to remind me to upload that sometime.

Todays piece of media is the first ten minutes of what is going to be a fascinating documentary on Will Eisner. Link

Also! Today I celebrate my 1 year 1 month and 1 day anniversary of blogging on Blogger. Huzzah!

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Twitter and Vertigo's DMZ

Some of you have already started asking, "Max, just what is twitter functionality?"

Twitter is a sort of global away message. From phone, computer, or instant messenger, you can tell the internet what you are up to. I know, it's totally lame. But I got bored a few nights back and didn't have anything better to do. So I made a twitter account.
The 'Twitter Live Updates' box on the right shows the last thing I sent to the Twitter Network. Think of it like a super-compressed update to the blog.

[EDIT: I've noticed that the twitter box is really lagging the blog's load time. Let me know if it's worth keeping, or if it's just too irritating.]


Recently, I started reading "DMZ," published by Vertigo. Link. It's an interesting story centered around a young journalist who finds himself trapped in Manhattan - the battle ground of America's next civil war. With obvious allegorical ties to the War On Terror, the title easily could have slipped to being nothing more than someone's soap box. But the writer has stayed focused on what's really interesting in this series - the characters and the environment that they're in. I should take a moment here to digress and also mention that so far, the only irritating thing about DMZ is that our protagonist 'Matty' does occasionally become the writer's mouthpiece. His idealism and naivete draw screaming breaks on an otherwise tight story.
The people 'Matty' meets are complex and mysterious, and if nothing else I keep reading just to see who stays a friend from issue to issue.The backdrop is uniquely modern, where in the face of a war on their porch regular Americans are able to put together some kind of life for themselves. This is really a marked departure for the languishing sense of self reliance and apathy that you get from reading the news.
Both somewhat anarchic and uplifting in the face of the face of the times we live in, the series is hailed as the 'next big thing' in comics. It seems pretty good after 12 issues, but an extended run will show whether it can really stay together.

This is something that I have noticed in long-running series of any variety. Like a projected image, a character fades further away from it's origin. It becomes indistinct and nothing more than an uncertainty. Hopefully this won't happen to DMZ.

Monday, February 12, 2007

The Return of the Blog

Well, it's been a long haul since the last real post.

First came the ridiculous video problems with my computer. You'd be sitting there just dandy and then all of a sudden the screen decided that it was a modern art video installation made by a collective of art students with an overly clever name. "Bad Apple," "Äpfeln von Video," or "You Won't Be Finishing That Paper Anytime Soon." Something like that.
After that came the loss of RAM. I cannot stress enough how irritating it was trying to use this computer with only 256mb of RAM. I know it seems ridiculous - my last laptop had 64mb and was considered a pretty 'RAD RIG' at the time (I am lying) - but it's true. iTunes was basically off limits, and iPhoto was out of the question. I could run maybe three programs at a time before things started really slowing down. However, it really speaks to the power of OS X since the only software that actually rolled over and died was VLC. Not saying that VLC isn't awesome, because it really is, but it didn't seem to like the situation.
During the time the RAM was missing - which was basically up to yesterday - my dear uncle Mark died. It was a wonderful service, held in Kentucky. The best funeral I have ever been to. There must have been hundreds of people in attendance, and with the family at one time or another.
And I don't know what else to say about that. I've found that it's only the important things that are hard to write about. Stuff like the alliterative patterns in Beowulf, that's easy. Important things are hard.

I better write this paper, it's due tomorrow.

Sunday, February 11, 2007

RAM Robbers Routed: The Return of the Blog


I GOT THE RAM BACK.

UPDATES RESUME MONDAY.

YES, I AM ALIVE.