"Art" Fair On A Stick

Ah, the Ann Arbor Art Fair. You've no doubt heard tell of it in song and legend. You have probably even gone so far as to doubt its existence.

Let me assure you that it is real.

Here's a quick rundown on the kind of stuff you would have seen this weekend at the Ann Arbor Art Fair:

1. Creepy Naked Art - There are just too many of these. And just because your photos are in black and white does not mean they are art. No matter how much photoshopping you do. Also, the guy with the tent next to the guy with the creepy water nymph paintings? You got troubles, dude. And don't think you are getting away either, Water Nymph man. I've got my eye on you.

2. Art-On-A-Stick - There are three things that can by found on stick at the Art Fair. The noble Corn Dog is of course present, as well as the "Chinese" creation 'Chicken-on-a-stick with fried noodles.' Though the later is substantially more delicious than the former, I still have no idea why it is on a stick. The last thing stick-bound is, oddly enough, art. Though this makes marginally more sense than the chicken, I still firmly believe that if its something clever on a stick and meant to go in your lawn then it is not art. I should also emphasize how much of this kind of crap there is at the art show. There is a lot.

3. Bad Fashion Decisions - Just because it might be warm out, and there are lots of people around does not mean you have to dress like that. Although I have to admit that the dude in the cargo man-skirt looked pretty cool.

4. 'Good' Art - See Below*

5. The Art Fair Dolls - Every year, someone or something places weirdly disfigured dolls in odd places around the art fair. Though they disappeared for a few years, a couple did show up in trees and secured to light-posts this year. Since this is a blog intended for mixed company, I will spare you the details and instead instruct you to imagine what a 7yr old boy with a soddering iron, a red marker, and a penchant for the grotesque could do with a Barbie doll. Whatever you are thinking of is probably very close to these horrible and wonderful little things.

6. Me - Yes, I was there. Every day. Part of working on the Diag Crew is having to cover Art Fair, and this lead me to walk around several times a day changing trash-bags and hauling away stuffed plastic sacks leaking fluid all over the place. After four ten-hour days of this, I finally lost it. Saturday was my worst day at work this summer. Despite having completed the wooden pirate-ship model we found some weeks earlier, I was otherwise mentally out to lunch. I am certain that nothing I said made any sense that day. To anyone who encountered me on Saturday (especially anyone who tried to talk to me on the phone that day), I feel I owe an apology.

Thankfully, Art Fair has passed. Today, my only day off this week, I woke late and spent the entire morning reading. After a quick trip down to the comic book store with Nate and his roommate Jane, pausing only briefly to play with iPhones, I decided to roost up on the fire escape. And here I have stayed.

Its wonderful. I've even lit some candles.
Tomorrow, I go back to work.
Today, nothing is allowed to bother me.

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*This is very subjective, I know. While the Art Fair has lots of 'cool' things, there were only a very few that actually made me feel bad for not having any money to give them. Here they are, for your viewing pleasure:

Rex Benson: Specializes in wonderful ceramics with a bend toward the bizarre and fantastical. I am reminded of Don Bluth animations, and other late 70's cartoons. Im also reminded of the work done by my old neighbor, Jimmy Thompson.

Chrsitine C. Schub: Her intricate oil paintings could be many things. Perhaps a city seen from above? A skyline? An artistic understanding of a circuit board? Whatever the analogy her cramped and busy little paintings really fascinated me.

Nick Wroblewski: My personal favorite from last yuear enchanted me again. I told him straigh up that I wish I could buy some of his work. And if anyone wants to spend a substantial sum of money on me, they should get me this:




There were many others that caught my attention, and Im sure many other worthy artists could be found amongst the crap on sticks. But these were my big three.

Also, this is one of the few blog-posts I have taken the time to edit, and re-read. If you are in a masochistic mood, you can read the first draft here. Im leaving it in all its whiney, boring, overly-detailed glory.